Usually, when it comes close to Valentine’s Day, it is all about happy couples and having a romantic time … But, what if, you are struggling with your relationship right now? What if your partner and you are taking “a pause”? What if your relationship just fell apart? Now, you have to watch all these supposedly happy couples and deal with the annoyance and jealousy creeping up in the back of your mind.
Believe me, I’ve been there, too. I can totally feel you! 😉 When my marriage fell apart I was devastated. The moment my Ex confessed that he had been cheating on me from the first day of our relationship onward, I finally understood why I had always felt he wasn’t present in our relationship. I had tried to reason his mental absence was due to the style of upbringing he had experienced, until his confession revealed the real cause to me.
And back then, I was also more than annoyed by all these perfect relationships and families I seemed to be surrounded by. But the truth is, no relationship is perfect and no relationship is always happy. To be entirely real, every relationship has at least one topic they keep struggling with, over and over again. I see this often with my clients as well.
What kept me going during my loneliest Valentine’s Day ever
I do remember quite good that the Valentine’s Day in suit of my separation from my ex-husband was my loneliest Valentine’s Day, ever! Especially living in the US during that time of the year, where it is everywhere all about Valentine’s Day, happiness, and love, I just wanted to disappear that I would not have to handle this loneliness and emptiness within me. But, what kept me going were my two wonderful daughters for whom I wanted to be strong. 😊 And, additionally what really helped me to focus on myself and push through all that sorrow and pain was a brain-based coaching method called Palo Alto Limbic Coaching®.
I initially participated in some training sessions and eventually became a certified Palo Alto Limbic Coach® myself. This method helped me understand where my real loneliness and emptiness had its true origins. Furthermore, I learned holistic techniques which finally helped me cope with many negative feelings I had bottled up inside me. Letting go some old opinions and believes about myself and my past relationships helped me start the process of freeing myself from negativity. Freeing yourself from hurt and other related feelings can also help you to create a Happy Valentine’s Day for yourself!
Tools which can help you create a Happy Valentine’s Day for yourself
How do you create a happy Valentine’s Day for yourself and fill the gaps you feel within you?
Take your time, and organize a Valentine’s Day which is filled with a lot of LOVE FOR YOURSELF! I am saying this, because if you do not have a deep and true love for yourself, you won’t have a true love in your relationship either. This is what I have learned the hard way! And seen with clients, too.
Developing a true love for ourselves is a continuing process and the progress within this process may be quicker or slower, depending on the individual. However, this is what you can do right now to enlighten your heart:
In my video I am presenting techniques that are handy tools which will enable you to connect with yourself on a deeper level.
- Tapping Negative Affect Erasing Method (NAEM)
- Bi-lateral Affirmation
Gain Empowerment with new values
Discovering and releasing old negative believes about yourself and replacing them with empowered new values can assisting you to see and feel who you really are, as well as what you really need in life or in your relationship. However, also consider: What would make you happy right now – and then just do it! Enjoy being you – Enjoy having a great time with yourself!
Additionally, sign-up for your Free Gift For Empowered Women, in order to receive further handy tools to assist you in your journey of filling the gap within you. Start changing your perspective towards yourself.
Also, check in with me on Facebook and follow my nine-week series on the nine step E.M.P.O.W.E.R.E.D. Women Success System and benefit from the newly released mind-hacks every week. kAleiDoscope Coaching & Counseling on Facebook
I wish you a very Happy Valentine’s Day!